Annoying

By Yona Su

I am annoyed. My ex-string quartet was asked to play in the Canberra Writers Festival in 2022. This festival is known to have some more modern and critical talks and showcases about current social and political issues. According to their website, the festival ‘aims to scrutinise today’s issues, reflect on the past, contemplate the future and challenge our understanding of all.’ You’d think, then, that there would be a filtration process in making sure that the shows weren’t racist and sexist, right? Hmmm no. The particular talk we were asked to perform for was one about Henry Lawson. For those who do not know Henry Lawson, he is considered one of Australia’s finest bush poets who has truly defined the (very white and very male) Australian identity. This identity is one characterised by the settlers and convicts who have arrived from England and were struggling to live on Australian terrain. Yet, Lawson’s poems draw on his experiences as someone who lived in Australia briefly during that time and it is oh so narrow and middle class and white, white, white. Not much challenging going on, hey.

As the panel began to introduce this poet, they highlighted a ‘side note’ that although Lawson was xenophobic, anti-Chinese, beat his wife and disliked the Indigenous people, he was a prolific poet that pushed forward what Australian identity was in relation to the bush .

Huh.

Heads up. I’m Chinese. My parents are Chinese. I’m pretty sure that one or two people in my quartet are part Chinese. This ‘side note’ of Lawson made me deeply uncomfortable. What was even more strange (and disgusting) was the Acknowledgement of Country that was said before this talk.

Yuck.

They also mentioned that this fucking poet didn’t even like the bush. Lawson only ventured out into the bush once. Hated it. Then moved back to Sydney and then to the UK.

Absolute classic.

What a useless definition of the Australian identity. I wanted to crawl under my skin or yell at the panel: “This is so fucking conservative and stupid”. Don’t they see the hypocrisy in all of this? And talking about lack of self-awareness, I turned to one of my quartet members at the end of the talk who had a look of concern in his eyes.

‘What’s up?’

He scrunched up his face. Yes! I thought he was on the same wavelength as I was .

“This is weird background music to be playing. Hahaha”

Sigh. How could I believe that he would know better? I smiled weakly at him and knew I had to get the FUCK out.